For the Ladies: “The Plan”

The Plan

by Danaya

How can I trust the plan when the plan has caused so much pain?

Broken hearts and souls torn apart all in the plans name?

But everything happens for a reason at least that’s what I’m told

So I try to accept that and hold on to hope even when it’s dark and cold

It is not easy and I’m often filled with doubt

I just don’t understand why my plans never work out

Like a few years back I knew I was in love

Yea we had our problems but struggle…no one is above

Our relationship wasn’t healthy Abusive if I’m being honest

But my little one could have been enough to make him keep his promise

I know it sounds irrational and maybe it wouldn’t have worked

But maybe my baby would have given me the strength to walk away before it got worse

That piece of me could have been enough to heal my tattered soul

The agony of that loss is buried in the story never told

Maybe the plan was for the relationship to end

But did it have to include taking a life before it could begin?

How can I trust the plan when the plan has caused so much pain?

Broken hearts and souls torn apart all in the plans name?

But everything happens for a reason At least that’s what I’m told

So I try to accept that and hold on to hope even when it’s dark and cold

It is not easy and I’m often filled with doubt

I just don’t understand why my plans never work out

A few years pass and I trust a man for the first time in my life

He shares plans of making me his wife

From the first conversation I knew we would last

Building a future by discussing the past

I never let anyone in so he invited me out

I stepped out of my shell I let go of my doubts

He unpacked my baggage and checked my insecurities

He mended the breaks of my heart on my sleeve

He handled me with care until the moment he stopped

I guess his forever meant until he decided to walk off

So, how can I trust the plan when the plan has caused so much pain?

Broken hearts and souls torn apart all in the plans name?

But everything happens for a reason At least that’s what I’m told

So I try to accept that and hold on to hope even when it’s dark and cold

It is not easy and I’m often filled with doubt

I just don’t understand why my plans never work out

I had plans of genuine love and affection

Of inseparable bonds and intimate connections

Of raising my child to love better than I

Of experiencing a forever that transcends time

To trust the plan is a difficult task

To say it all was necessary…all of my painful past?

My broken heart and souls torn apart all in the plans name?

How can I trust the plan when the plan has caused so much pain?

Danaya’s “The Plan” is part one of a three part series. For more, follow Danaya’s Blog here.